Saturday, January 30, 2016

Sign

This post is going to seem like there are way to many topics for one post but I promise they will all tie into each other...................

Lately I have been wondering if I have been revealing too much about our journey. I know some of you will say yes, and others will say no. My whole purpose of blogging about our struggle with infertility was to let others know that are suffering in silence know that they are not alone. However lately I have people asking if we are pregnant yet or if treatment worked this month. I know that they mean well however those types of questions aren't what I want to hear. Yes I know that I am an open book and will try my best to answer any question you have however there are some questions that need to not be asked. If and when we get pregnant we will reveal it on our own, in our own time. I don't need to be put on the spot with these questions. They become a constant remind of what is going on and it just hurts.

 
 
Yesterday (1/29/16) I woke up convinced that it was going to be a bad day due to a dream that I had. Well turns out that it might actually be the sign I have been waiting for, for the last 2 years from mama. A few good things happen in our favor............
 
 
You might remember a few weeks ago I had said that the idea of a cryobank was floating around....... Well after weeks of research and phone calls, we have finally decided that we will be using a local cryobank to freeze my husband's sperm. After all these phone calls with the cryobank, our current fertility doctor, and a fertility doctor that the cryobank works with, we have come up with an amazing plan that works for us. Not only will it work for us but every month we will be saving about $100. Yes we will actually be saving money doing this, I know it shocked me too!!! Before you ask I will answer the question I am pretty sure you are wanting to ask..... 'Why don't you just take a break while hes gone', for us taking that break while he is gone is heart breaking. We feel as though if we take the break all of our work thus far will be for nothing. Yes we understand that he could potentially miss huge moments throughout this process. But for us those don't outweigh the end goal. Just because he is in the military doesn't mean we have to put our dream of having a family on hold. We are more than just the military. We are a normal husband and wife wanting to have children, to become parents, to hear the pitter patter of little feet running down the hall, to hear those first words of 'dada' and 'mama'. Why shouldn't we be able to work on that goal just because he will be deployed? There are so many advances in science and medicine at our fingertips of course we will use it as long as it is within our means. We are extremely lucky to have an amazing fertility doctor that has agreed to do anything and everything (even working in conjunction with a fertility doctor in another practice) to help us make our dreams a reality.



We have had multiple ultrasounds this month to check on my eggs size so that we could pinpoint when we were going to do the trigger shot and go in for the iui. Well it had turned out that they weren't growing like they needed to be. That was devastating to me. The fact that my body decided now of all times to stop responding in that way. So this cycle was to be considered a dud. Together with our fertility doctor we decided that we will be adding in an injectable that will help them grow starting this next cycle. Well this next cycle scared me due to the fact that our time is extremely limited before the deployment happens, so missing any more cycles was not an option for us. We decided that this Monday I will go in for blood work to see if I actually did ovulate or not. If I didn't then we are going to jump start my period. This plan had eased my mind. Well yesterday I started to get intense pains in my right side so out of curiosity I took an OPK, I GOT MY PEEK!!!!! I instantly texted our doctor and he said meet him today for ultrasound and iui. I was extremely excited because that is 2 things that have gone in our favor finally. That is the moment I got this overwhelming feeling that the dream was the sign from mama that everything is going to be OK. So today we went to the doctors office excited and ready........ Whelp my lining was not thick enough. To the point that suppositories (progesterone) wouldn't help it get thick enough in time. Our doctor decided that it wasn't a good idea to do the iui, that if we did and it was successful that it would end in a miscarriage. That is something we aren't willing to risk. Even though this month ended up being a dud in the end, weirdly I have this feeling of calm. 








Thursday, January 21, 2016

A letter to address a comment that has been said to me

*I am not going to mention any ones name on this post*

Dear person,


The comment you said to me the other day was totally uncalled for. If you don't remember what it was I will refresh your memory. You said, "why are you even still trying to have a baby when he leaves soon? Don't you think its selfish to rip those experiences away from him"..... Excuse me who are you to say what I am ripping from my husband? Were you behind closed doors with us when we made the decision to continue our journey? No you were not, so you have no right to judge us for our decision!!!!

For your information the fact that my husband could potentially miss milestones in a pregnancy does break our hearts. But that in no way shape or form outweigh the outcome at the end. You have not experienced this journey with us, you only know what we choose to share. Until you are in this situation you have no right to judge what our choices are.

I get it this whole thing is foreign to you so you don't know exactly what to say. Well here's a tip say it to yourself first if you feel a sting then chances are you shouldn't be saying it to me. I also understand that I made the choice to blog about this process, however that does not make me "fair game" for judgment and ridicule. It also does not give you the right to say whatever you chose.

Call me crazy but, he can miss out on my looking like a whale, having acne, and being irrational from the hormones. I don't want him to know when I'm so constipated it takes me an hour to poo. I don't want to worry about shaving when I can't even see my bits and pieces. I'll take the whole bed to myself and all of the pillows without any guilt! He'd likely make it home in time for the birth, and won't miss many of the infant and toddler milestones. Life is all about what you make of it. There will be positives and negatives in every situation. Only you get to choose which side you focus on so choose wisely. 

Sincerely,
Aly
  












Friday, January 8, 2016

THE COUNTDOWN BEGINS

Whelp we have the official date that A leaves for training in preperation for this deployment. Ugh actually typing that word made my heart sink. So our clock has officially started and as much as I am mentaly preparing myself, I dont want this day to come. I know that I am going to want to just crawl into bed and cry. But I can't, I have to remain strong for him as much as I need to for myself.

There is so many things that we have to do to prepare for this deployment. We are going to have to update his WILL (just saying that freaks me out considering everything that I have been through in the last year). Also we will need to get a million and one Power of Atterny's (ok maybe not that much but we still need to get alot of them). Then we have to make sure he has everything that he is taking with him, our house is litterally going to look like it exploaded multicam. We are also going to be having people that will be visiting us before he leaves so that they can see him before he's off to defend our Country.


All while this is going on we will still countinue our treatments. Talk about stress upon stress!!! We are remaining hopeful that by the time he leaves we will have our BFP..... For us him being gone and the posibility of him missing out on the pregnancy related things does not out weigh what the outcome would be. At this point and if our timelines match up yes he would miss alot practicly almost all of it but at least he would be here for the most important part, the delivery.

In the next coming weeks and months I will be doing more deployment preperation type of posts to help those that don't know and that might be going through this for the first time. To help ease their mind on what they need to do and not do. I know how overwhelming all of this can be.


Tuesday, January 5, 2016

Chomps Review + Giveaway

*POWERED BY BRANDBACKER*


I recieved these products free in return for my honest opinion




First off a little about the company:

About the Product
Chomps Snack Sticks are an awesome new health product made with 100% Non-GMO Grass-Fed Angus Beef which is sourced from New Zealand. The sticks contain no artificial ingredients (no nitrites, nitrates, MSG, colors, flavors) and are shelf stable for a year with the help of celery juice! Best of all, they taste AMAZING!  

Think much healthier and tastier version of Slim Jim's. 
Learn About the Brand
Peter and Rashid started Chomps out of an apartment in Chicago in 2012 with the help of their wives. Since then the product has rapidly gained popularity in the CrossFit and Paleo space. It continues to grow in popularity hitting new target markets including Outdoorsmen, Bodybuilders, Gluten Free Dieters and Parent's looking for healthy snacks for their kids.  

The team mission is to create the highest quality jerky product on the market.


REVIEW 
So I received 3 flavors: Original, Crankin' Cran, Hoppin' JalapeƱo. The flavors are amazing. They are used with natural ingredients. You can taste and smell the freshnes from the moment you open them. My favorite flavor was Original it definitely tasted so much better than other brands of beef sticks that I have tried. The only bad thing that I can say is that the individual packaging is not easy to open, we ended up having you use scissors to open them. But other than that i am very pleased with this product and can definitely see myself buying these in the future.

Now onto the giveaway!!!!






Friday, January 1, 2016

BE YOU FREE PRINTABLE




To get this 7.5x5.5 free printable click here